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“If Only Sarcasm Burned Calories” T-Shirt – Witty & Sarcastic Humor Tee, Funny Gift for Dry-Witted Souls
“If Only Sarcasm Burned Calories” T-Shirt – Witty & Sarcastic Humor Tee, Funny Gift for Dry-Witted Souls
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🔥 "If only sarcasm burned calories… I’d be a size 0 by Tuesday."
Say goodbye to boring tees and hello to the only shirt that turns your daily eye rolls into a fitness routine. The “If Only Sarcasm Burned Calories” T-Shirt is the ultimate wearable punchline for anyone who’s ever said something sharp just to survive a conversation.
Whether you’re shutting down small talk, roasting a bad joke, or subtly side-eyeing someone’s life choices — this shirt proves your sarcasm has real value. And hey, if only it came with an actual calorie count, we’d all be in peak shape by now.
✨ Why This Shirt Is a Must-Have:
- 🎨 Sharp Wit, Clean Design – Minimalist typography that packs maximum attitude. No over-the-top graphics — just pure, dry humor you can wear every day
- 👕 Soft, Comfortable Cotton Fabric – Lightweight and breathable for all-day wear — perfect for work, coffee runs, or hiding from awkward family dinners
- 😏 For the Dry-Witted & Deadpan Realists – Ideal for sarcastic overthinkers, introverts who see everything, and anyone whose default mood is “I’m fine… I’m just judging you silently”
- 🎁 The Perfect Gift For:
- That friend who never says what they mean (but you know exactly what they’re thinking)
- The coworker who delivers passive-aggressive comments like poetry
- Anyone who’s ever said “I’m not mad… I’m just disappointed” with a straight face
- 💬 Guaranteed Reactions: Smirks, eye rolls, and at least one person whispering: "That’s me."
👉 Click "Add to Cart" now — because sarcasm isn’t just free energy. It’s fashionable.
🔥 Bonus Point: If only it burned calories, we’d all be in the gym by lunchtime. But until then… wear your sass and call it motivation.
📌 Available in multiple colors & sizes – for men, women, non-binary, and anyone who prefers a quiet eye roll over small talk.
💬 Sarcasm may not burn calories… but this shirt? That’s pure emotional fuel.
XS | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | 4XL | 5XL | |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Width, in | 16.00 | 18.00 | 20.00 | 22.00 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 | 30.00 | 32.00 |
Length, in | 27.00 | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 | 33.00 | 34.00 | 35.00 |
Sleeve length, in | 7.99 | 8.23 | 8.50 | 8.74 | 9.02 | 9.25 | 9.49 | 9.72 | 9.96 |
Size tolerance, in | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
EU representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
Product information: Gildan 64000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Warnings, Hazard: For adults, Made in Bangladesh
Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors , Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean
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